Just go home


 I think I’ve finally realized my purpose, it’s just a matter of embracing it and pursuing it. You know what? Even if I fall, I’ll get right back up and I just won’t sit there and feel sorry for myself, I won’t turn around or doubt. I’ll be determined, I’ll be different, I’ll always be willing to learn and most importantly I’ll stay prayed up because nothing I’ve done up to this point matters. The slate is clean, I’ve been given another chance and because of my failures and shortcomings, I’m now wiser, I’m tougher and I know my worth. It won’t catch me off guard again, I’ll be ready, I’ll be stronger and this time I’ll be victorious. Say what you must, report what you see, but be careful what you believe. I can hear the chatter, I detect the whispers traveling from ear to mouth and from social site to social site. Don’t get it twisted, I may be limping but I’m limping in the right direction. Please understand that I ran as fast and as far as I could and He watched me run, and knew the exact moment when I would be thirsting for Him. He did what He had to, He needed my attention. I ran away from Him and now I’m limping back to Him. I have been hurt with unimaginable pain, I’ve been messed up and I’ve been to the point where nothing makes sense anymore. But through it all, somewhere in the shadows, He stood patiently waiting for me. I ran but my running wasn’t in vain, see I picked up a few things while running that didn’t make sense, but on my way limping back it started to all make sense, I get it now. Don’t despise me because I ran out there, for I can now get the man or woman who’s now out there to come in here because I can tell them that I was out there and I know what it’s like to be out there, I can also let them know how good it is in here. Don’t despise my plight, one writer says, “it was good for me that I’d been afflicted, I get to know the goodness of God.” I may smell like the pig pen and that may be all you see. I can’t blame you because you weren’t in there with me when He reminded me that I’m still a son and that I’m better than this. He couldn’t let me continue the way I was going, He wouldn’t let me continue, yet He allowed it for just a while because all things work together. The bad breakups, the disappointments, the let downs and betrayals actually worked together for my good. Understand it or not, believe it or not, accept it or not but situation after situation have made me want Him more until I’m clinging and begging Him to never let me go. How do I know He loves me? I’ll tell you how; after standing in a dark place and one by one all the faces that have let me down, all the faces that I couldn’t depend on started to disappear until it was Just Him and I thought He’d scold me for running away but He didn’t do that. It was like it never happened because as He held his arms out, I tried explaining and making excuses but all He had for me was compassion. It is only by His grace, it is only by His power that Dewayne Barnett is living. “Here I am, send me.” I was was dead and for those who know me understands what I mean when I say that. How many of you know that when God calls your name, it doesn’t matter what other people call you, it doesn’t matter what you’re doing and what your plan is. When God calls your name, the universe shifts into place and a pathway is created called second chance boulevard. You must take it because if you follow His voice it would lead you down that pathway. It’s not an easy road, but keep your head up and straight. People are going to talk, they will say that you fell from grace but that’s absurd. My bible tells me that where sin abounds, grace super abounds. When you’re in your lowest state, Jesus is right there closer than you think. So don’t let anyone condemn you, the sweetest part of developing a relationship with Him is when you finally realize that He walks with you through the most trying times of your life and He walks with you through the happiest times of your life. I leave this with you, if He is always there even when you did the wrong things, how much more will He be there when you’re limping back home? Your first decision is not to shower, not to pretty up, not to look good for the neighbors…your first decision is to go home. Just go home..God bless.

Coming home, coming home,
Nevermore to roam;
Open wide Thine arms of love,
Lord, I’m coming home.

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