A breakup that doesn’t break you down


Just to piggyback a bit off my last post, moving on as we all know can be difficult. It speaks volumes in ways by telling us what once was, isn’t now and might never will be. It a sign of throwing in the towel, if you’re not someone who usually gives up. It is a tool used to deflate dreams and hopes shared with your special someone. Moving on means that you are now available but she is too. How quickly she accepts an invitation to go on a date could tell you whether or not she is over you. But be careful gentlemen, if you read too much into that, you might not realize dating so soon is just a sign she’s not really over you, but a sign that she is trying to get over you. I applaud those folks who after getting out of a relationship take their time before jumping into another. Those are the people who realize the importance of self worth and choose to take this time to improve themselves. For example, having been out of my relationship for months now, it took me shorter than I expected to get over her. At one point however I was stuck, I didn’t want to picture her with anyone else, I didn’t care to know who she was dating. I just wanted a few days to sulk, feel sorry for myself and eventually tell myself to move on. It didn’t matter who she was dating, if not this guy, then later it will be another. I decided to accept it as it is, take my one straight shot of pain and get it over with. I know I would be over her soon but sometimes we just need those days to let it all out, leave it all there and move on. Don’t drag those days though, line them up, cry if you have to…but every day you pass through is a victory and you must build on that. Soon days will turn to weeks then months and then years, you’re on your way to getting through, you just have to keep going. I didn’t immediately start looking for someone else, I looked in the mirror and saw someone who’s heart had been broken and needed some love, I wanted to be the one to give that love. I couldn’t wait for someone else to come by and show me, I decided to show myself. I’ve been using this time to figure out what my dream was and how can I accomplish it? I started writing a blog to express my feelings about my failed relationship and I literally started feeling good about myself again. I’ve decided to go back to school, I’m looking into getting my own business started. I have people around me that love and support me. I’m taking this time for me because I deserve it. I could still be sulking and upset and unforgiving, but all that would be holding me back or would be extra weight that I would have to carry with me. Lets make it easy on ourselves, we deserve more and if no one will give that to us then we give ourselves more. I know it’s easier said than done, I know that complex feelings are usually the results of a broken relationship. You believe that you will get back together so you sulk and hope that it happens. Listen, whether you’re getting back together or not, does it hurt to take a look at yourself and decide to do what’s best for you? A breakup can be difficult especially when this person means the world to you. Especially when you have never met anyone quite like them. Breakups can be harder on some folks because its just another indication of a failed attempt at happiness. It can be difficult to handle because it can fool us into thinking no one loves us or cares. It clearly defines what’s wrong with us, but also allows us to focus on ourselves. Some of the greatest things I’ve ever accomplished in my life were not results of a sound union with someone. It was my determination to better myself, it was my dedication to uplift me and my conviction to realize that I was better than who I was pretending to be. I was stronger than I thought and because of my experience and heartbreak, I am also now wiser than I was before. We break up to grow up, because we just can’t grow together. God Bless. Leave a comment.

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