Be ready to listen after the fire

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You don’t understand who I am or what I’ve been through
You see me, I smile but inside I’m dark
I cannot allow anyone to see me like this
But how can I hide it, surely someone somewhere knows
I see how noses are turned up at me
And I hear the talking
A failure is what they call me
A loser is how they refer to me
It’s not that I haven’t tried, but every time I do
I’m knocked back to the ground
It’s not like I want to stay here, but no one will help me
They judge me, they laugh at me and no asks how I’m doing
How can you not see that I’m suffering, how can you not perceive?
I look like I have it together on the outside but inside I’m a mess
I can’t keep hiding the way I feel
I can’t keep pretending, I just can’t hold it in any longer
My heart is broken, my spirit is crushed and my future is uncertain
What do they call this place?
This place of desolation and degradation?
What do you call this place of destruction?
A place where I don’t matter
A place where I’m not seen but widely noticed
I can’t take this, I want out of this place
God when are you gonna get me out of this place?
The wind came, You’re not there
The earthquake came, I can’t feel You there either
The fire tried to consume me and you still didn’t show up
But then You came in a still small voice
You tell me…the wind is meant to blow away the things that are not like You
But I’ll still be standing after that
The earthquake came to shake my principles, priorities and my independence
But I stood my ground
The fire came to purge me, it was hot…it hurt but it purified me
So after all this, after I withstood all this…You will then speak and tell me your will
Speak Lord, Your servant is listening.

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